Overview:
A psychology instructor confronts her own biases and discovered the transformative power of listening to students’ stories.
Educators don’t always have the luxury of complete control of the curriculum or class size. We have the power to check if stereotyping students is a silent danger that could impact how we teach and what students learn. We, ourselves, are just as likely to be stereotyped by the students who may judge our professional merit based on our age, ethnicity, and gender.
~
Day One: My first day on the job as a Psychology instructor. I am eager to teach a colorful mixture of empty-nesters, recovering addicts, a grandmother, an ex-Hell’s Angels, and folks from foreign countries with great dreams and a dubious command of the English language.
I watched and listened to students who shared sarcastic jokes about the ones who “can’t even speak English”, the young teen whose four-letter vocabulary might show up on an internship, the ones stealing furtive glances at their cell phones during lectures, and the few who appeared comatose. It didn’t take long to stereotype the assumed winners and losers as I arrived at conclusions about their beliefs, values, and abilities based solely on their classroom behavior.
I did wince when I reviewed English essays and learned that one pregnant student had to deliver her baby to the cemetery after her placenta broke. I read how a 19-year-old Jamaican girl was gang-raped by her boyfriend and his buddies after a school dance. The student who returned home from a party found his mother slumped against the wall, blood flowing from her head wound, gun still warm in her hand.
I didn’t want to accept my feelings. There was too much shock trying to understand and accept what had happened to these young folks who were still determined to find meaning and value in their lives. When their final Psychology exam was around the corner, I assumed they would only play back what they had memorized. With a touch of daring and hope, I reconstructed the test.
Their final exam – a single question – made them gasp.
What did you learn in this class?
Their replies made me gasp.
Samuel, an ex-Hell’s Angel who had bragged about having sex in the elevator, wrote: “I didn’t
know I had low self-esteem. I always believed if I acted powerful and fearless, it meant I was special. No one would challenge me to a fight. When you talked about feelings. I realized I never really knew what I was feeling.”
Jennifer, a tough 20-year-old, stated: “I show certain people a lot of anger and aggression, like my mother does. I learned that if I keep acting that way, I could become like my mother and continue where she leaves off.”
Maria, from Santa Domingo and mother of three, wrote: “This Psychology class was a big help because it kind of opened doors in my mind that I didn’t even know existed. I learned the boundaries I have in my life aren’t sufficient. I’m the one who has to change.”
John, age 42, rarely offer comments or questions during class but he did appear to have unearthed a breakthrough. “I learned I’m passive-aggressive. I didn’t even know what that was supposed to mean until you seemed to be describing me. I avoid arguments at any cost yet it seems I’m always the one who actually starts them.”
Tina, age 19 and mother of one, wrote, “I used to compare myself to others, like my friends and family but now I think about how I feel about myself or a situation and not how others felt about it. I also learned to ask myself about my feelings a lot more. I honestly don’t think I sat and thought, how do I feel? Now I think about what I am going to say or do. I think about the consequences of my impulses. ‘
Alec, age 25, never said much during class but used this paper to reveal how much attention he actually had devoted to the classroom discussions. “This class really got me thinking about what I really need in life, its real values and how I need to be less sarcastic towards my friends. I’ve been nothing but mean, not listening to them. They laughed and told me I was crazy to think I could just up and change just like that. I said, ok, watch. At the end of six weeks, they saw that I had changed.”
Most of the students’ papers made it clear they had been listening during lectures and discussions. They had invited me into the deepest part of their being, demanding I forsake any preconceived ideas I harbored because I did not know their private trials.
The course had encouraged the students to glance into their family history and assess all they may have learned without consent. Ultimately, they recognized what values and beliefs should stay and be protected from cultural bias. We educators are their parents, their savior and their henchmen rolled into one so we have to honor their vulnerability and help them discover their sense of worth.
The Perils of Stereotyping
There was very little bias amongst the students who seemed to be more accepting of each other’s short-comings. For many, their backgrounds were rich with more trauma than most privileged students are subjected to. They knew what downtrodden felt like.
An educator may bring an unconscious bias into the classroom when communicating, grading, and treating certain students more personally and favorably. Favoritism is rarely ignored by others. Once confidence and self-esteem start going downhill, students may turn to social media for comfort or recognition. These platforms, not known as havens of empathy, compete for the minds and bodies of our students. They may even guide the student in the direction of self-harm or harm to others. Hurt, anger and frustration are strong emotions that may not even be apparent after a teacher degrades a student in front of his/her peers. With school violence showing up too frequently in the news, educators need to pay more attention to how their own weaknesses and leanings can impact their students. Critical thinking is blocked by stereotyping and limits our views of others and ourselves. Student confidence and self-esteem can be on the line when teachers are unaware of their blind spots, a lesson learned from my ignorance.
The Center for Disease Control and Prevention reports statistics that are on the rise with suicide as the leading cause of death in children ages 15-19 and the second leading cause of death for children 14-15 years of age.
As educators, it is vital that we recognize each student’s strengths and listen with respect and sincerity to their questions and comments. What we say and do has the power to transform an individual who may feel invisible at home or in the classroom.
~
