Overview:
Teachers are often tasked with “teaching with urgency” but yet, kids need time to practice being good little humans.
I’ve heard every teacher I know say it at least once: “My students need to practice manners.”
Here’s something else I’ve heard them all say right after that: “I don’t have time to teach my students manners.”
I get it. I teach English at a middle school on a block schedule. I teach with a sense of urgency, every day, every lesson. I use SEL, ELD, UDL, PBL and a little bit of teacher pixie dust too.
But in recent years, I’ve learned that however you think of it, what many of us call manners is the lubricant that makes my classroom run like a politely-oiled machine. As a result, I’ve developed strategies to integrate a sense of politeness into my classroom culture, and it now actually saves me class time. I call this teaching with a sense of decency.
Here are the simple things I do to instill that decency in my class, how I do it, and why it helps me teach with a sense of urgency, too.
Non-negotiable Greetings
Each day, when students enter, they are given time to settle in, take out materials, and give a what’s up to a friend. Pretty standard. But directly after that, to start, students welcome our amazing para-educator, Ms. Fernanda, with a “Good morning.” We then point out a willing student and give them a “Good morning,” too. Often, I ask the class to follow up with a hello to the other students sitting at their tables. I nearly always find them more than willing. The class then greets me with a good morning. The simple fact is that classrooms are a lot like your car engine on a cold morning. They need time to idle before you drive off into the unknown. Establishing a greeting of some kind is how you turn the key to get the car started in the first place. It’s also the decent thing to do when your teacher begins his/her lesson.
Give a Round of Applause to Your Visitors, Then to Your Students
When an adult visitor comes to our class, any adult visitor, I introduce them and interrupt the class with a, “Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr. Smith, our esteemed basketball coach,” or “Senors y Senores, Ms. Cook, your future and incredible math teacher.” I then give them a round of applause, which is almost always followed by the majority of the class. Mr. Smith even pops in daily just to hear clapping because, as Mr. Smith says, “It makes me feel so good.”
This small acknowledgement of others has had many positive side effects in my class and on campus. My favorite side effect is that applauding for visitors nearly always carries over to clapping for students in class. I wish I had a dollar for every time a kid said, “Hey, we should give so and so a round of applause for their birthday, or for sharing their essay.” But teaching kids to applaud is also a time saver. Students who acknowledge others in a total physical response acknowledge their part in the group tangibly. They also acknowledge that making others feel welcome is our class job, one that their teacher cares enough about to create a routine.
The Complaint Box
There is no drama like middle school drama. But I’d hazard a guess that if you’re reading this, your class has its fair share no matter what grade level you teach. In my class, drama is saved for someone else. Why? Because we just do not have time for that. Instead, I keep a simple sign that says, “All venting will be heard, just at the right time.” This tells kids that their teacher does care, but he’s too busy, and it’s inappropriate in an English classroom.
To fulfill my promise, an old mailbox from my childhood home serves as a complaint box. Many teachers keep something similar, and probably for similar reasons as I do. The idea is simple: If the venting isn’t about work, it goes in the box. I find that once I get to the kiddo who put in the note, they’ve usually gotten better simply by writing what’s bothering them on paper. But in the meantime, my entire class keeps going. This saves time and blood pressure I need for other issues in my day. It also provides students a place they know is safe when they really need help. And that is more often than you might think.
Teach the “Don’t Be Rude Graph”
As I’ve written about before, students and teachers must have agreed upon understandings when it comes to terms like honesty or respect. When these terms are not calibrated in a classroom, what I call “cultural confusion” sets in.
In my class, I make sure students understand that to me, what I call “rude behavior” is momentary and something I, too, need to work on. When I’m not polite, I’m momentarily rude. I let them know it happens, but our job is to minimize it. We then take time to identify what it means to be rude, and I take a running list of what kids tell me. Generally, students will define being rude as a variety of things. But once we’ve had some time to talk, it’s often understood as a simple thing: Rude behavior is taking someone else’s time. The more time we take, from the more people, the more we are displaying rude behavior instead of polite behavior. So how can we know when this is happening so we can improve?
To help students see this with clarity, I illustrate the “Don’t Be Rude Graph.” I draw a line plot with 0 on the left and 1 second increments panning to the right. Then, I offer different hypothetical classroom scenarios. For example, “The teacher calls the class to the rug” or “It’s time to line up for lunch.” I then plot a series of Xs to represent each student. In each hypothetical scenario, I note that most students lined up quickly in just a couple of seconds, while a few took a bit more time. Each hypothetical student is designated with an X on the line plot. However, I then place a hypothetical outlier. I plot this outlier X in a much further place along the timeline. Importantly, this helps students see that while they are taking their time, most or many of the other students are waiting. Essentially, their time is being taken as they could have started the lesson already or have gone off to lunch if just one student had been faster. I find that this simple chart helps kids of many levels realize that their lack of organization, or inattention, does have a side effect in class.
Inevitably, an issue always arises about the concept of rudeness, and a good teacher must address it properly. We have many students with special needs, for whom English is a second language, and who have unique circumstances. I am always sure to identify that these students are not being rude and instead teach into the idea that being polite is helping those who either need more time, more understanding, or who could use a buddy.
The Noise Radius Chart and #6 The Music Monitor
I’m getting old, and because of a slight hearing loss, student background conversations can make it really hard for me to hear when I’m one-on-one or with a small group. On the other hand, I want my class to be collaborative. I know that a silent classroom is one where partners aren’t helping each other. But anyone in a modern classroom for more than a day knows that kids typically need to be taught how to regulate what I call a class’s “voice volume.” I have two methods that I love to help with this.
First, I teach a little lesson using what I call the “Voice Radius Diagram.” I draw a square representing the classroom and about thirty Xs representing kids inside the square. Then, I focus on two Xs side-by-side and draw a circle around them both. I tell the class that when they whisper, only this student and their partner can hear. I point to the other Xs and explain that no one else is disturbed. But then I point to an X a longer distance away, and I draw a massive circle including it and an X on the other side of the room. I then tell students that when the radius of conversation covers a larger distance, everyone in the circle is disturbed. Students can clearly see that if one person across the room can hear their talking, then so can every single student in the classroom, too.
My second method to help kids with the class’s voice volume is to use music. Many teachers, myself included, know the value of soft background music during working time. Simply tell the students that if they cannot hear the music in their background that the class’s voice volume is too loud. Then, ask a class monitor, preferably a student who can handle this distraction, to remind the class while you are in your group teaching. I find that I can adjust the volume of the music day by day and week by week. This technique can thus become a great way to prepare students, in phases, for the silence that testing requires later in the year.
Don’t Just Give Snacks, Give a Micro-Lesson on Please and Thanks
Some teachers give their kids treats. Some don’t. But my middle schoolers, every so often get small treats like licorice or a cookie. My students may think Mr. Courtney has just decided to be a nice guy. He’s proud of them, and he was feeling nice. And that’s true. But what they don’t know is that I have an ulterior motive.
Every so often, while kids are working quietly, I take out something cheap (I love licorice for both its price and because it’s rarely allergic to anyone). I walk around, opening the lid as I see kids working hard. I smile and tell each kid something like, “You’re working great today. Would you like a licorice?”
In nearly every single instance, a child will say, “Yes, please.” And in nearly every single instance, after they’ve taken one, they say, “Thank you,” after which I of course, say, “You’re welcome.” If they don’t say either, I can quickly remind them what every good parent reminds their children at home: “What do we say when…?”
I have found that by giving my students treats from time to time, I actually have given them an opportunity to practice manners with me in a way they understand. And take it from me, some kids could use a little more practice than others-which I happily squeeze in. I have noted over the years that students use please, thank you, and you’re welcome far more, for many other things, after just a couple of treats.
To many of us in schools, to teach with a sense of urgency is our mandate. But that mandate must come with a mandate to create a class where everyone can learn and where everyone wants to learn. With decency as a base, I believe teachers always have far more than a decent chance to make the most of their day.
